Whilst hanging out my washing today, I couldn’t help but notice that approximately 90% of my laundry now consists of socks. I haven’t counted how many pairs I currently own, but the figure roughly stands at around the ‘lots’ mark. Being a 21st century jet-setter go-getter type, I naturally often find myself buying cheap socks in Tescos to avoid having to do laundry - a habit that has now netted me a vast collection of near-identical striped socks. Looking at the kingdom of undergarments hanging before me I was suddenly struck by the realisation that despite owning a huge collection of socks, I invariably seem to run out of clean ones within what feels like roughly the same length of time.

Clearly on the verge of a groundbreaking discovery, I became scrawling down my calculations.

Upon closer inspection, it became immediately clear that my ability to draw underwear was significantly poorer than initially anticipated. In addition to this however, I discovered the following key findings:

• 2 socks will invariably become 1 sock over a period of time (an unproven theory, yet one widely accepted in the field of quantum physics)

• One sock when multiplied by one sock will still remain one sock (similar in some respects to the equivalent calculation using numbers ‘stand-alone’ without introducing underwear factors into the equation)

• Applying the same logic that ‘a sock’ will indefinately remain ‘a sock’, ‘socks’ will remain to be ‘socks’ regardless of the quantity, thus rendering the final quantity irrelevent when developing perceptions of laundry frequency.

In conclusion: Socks.